Need to Change my Winter Blues

And What is the weather like today? Snowy.

I talked with S a little last night. I asked him if he thought I had been miserable.
Yup. You've been miserable all month! He insisted.

S is all confused as to how things can bother me so much. Says he doesn't get it. Why did I move up here in the first place if I was going to miss my family and friends so much?
J: Because I was drowning in NJ I didn't know I would be miserable.

J: I don't think I had the chance to find myself up here because we got into a relationship so fast.
S: What sleeping around would have helped you "find yourself"
J: no. I am happy I have you You helped me find home!
S: But you hate your job, don't like where you live (the list goes on).
J: But if it were for you I would have been miserable from the start. You make me more comfortable. You gave me home!! Without you I would have bailed months ago!!
S: Happy I make you feel better Baby!

S : "you've Changed" That's a fantastic 4 month mark in a relationship.
Reasons: In the beginning drinking wasn't bad. "We haven't been drinking as much as we could" is S's favorite quote. Now you don't even want to drink.

J: I can't help it. I don't wanna be that drunk girl, and I defiantly don't want to lose my dreams of a family because I have to party all the time. I came up here to Change, Change is what I want to do.

Why do you care what other people think of you soooo much?? S doesn't understand because He really only cares about what a few people think, me being one. But he completely missed the point. Its what I think of myself.

See? SUMMER!! We need you!!

Waiting for Spring

Well, Silly me moves up to Massachusetts just in time for Fall... and Winter. I was bruiting, Instead of seriously enjoying my summer for Whinny deployment sucks reasons, I waited for September to Arrive from March 2009. In fact I also waited for September to arrive June 2008 too... I was a silly girl. When September blew around and My life Moved North to this beautiful state and some much needed change I grew annoyed with J for taking my September away so abruptly and annoyed with J and myself for Waiting for September and letting my summer days disappear as fast as they came. I had some fun summer moments but This summer 2010... I can not wait for it's arrival. Well I've got my comfort food remedies, but that can only bring me so far. I had a wonderful fall and this winter is beautiful but COLD! I've grown bored of it. I pray God gives me the strength to find the beauty in the winter again and hurry it along so the next thing I know it's Spring!!

there's always the shore